Friday, December 24, 2004

how are you????

Why is it that EVERY time i come home for the holidays, the only conversation i manage to have with former classmates consists of"How are you? Oh, good, im good too! Happy Holidays." Or worse, the person with whom im involved in this mindless conversation takes it a step further by asking the dreaded"what have you been up to?". Of all ridiculous questions to ask, i mean, really, we havent spoken in (anywhere from 2 to 8) years, do you really expect/care to be filled in on of the goings on in my life? No, you dont, yet you and i will both waste anywhere from 2 to 5 minutes of our lives pretending we care!! And god help me if we get to that point in the conversation where we both realize we really are over it, but, cant find an out, so we banter on for unknown minutes probably not even listening to what each other are saying, searching the room for a familiar face to escape this high school flashback. Dont get me wrong, id say one out of every 5 peeps, i am sincerely glad to run into. Anyhoo, thats what happened last night. Just another night in fresno. I met up with my friends, we went to a couple of the local hot spots(like theres more than a couple, hah!!), and none to my surprise(aside from the folks home for the holidays, which made everywhere slightly more jumpin than usual) its all the same kids getting hammered and having to go home at 130(i was like, what, last call at 1230? where am i utah?). Gawd, im sooooo glad i left this blackhole of a town!! I mean, i DO miss my family and friends, but godddd, i freakin hate this town. Its like time has stood still since i left. The crazy thing is, it will always be like this!!! Its like the town moves on slo mo while all the rest of us are on normal speed!!! Oh fresno.

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

tis the season

Well my friends, here it is tuesday morning, and im off to cali!! This weekend was pretty cool!! Friday night we went out to this little dance club around the corner called the gold mine saloon, its got lots of retro video games and plays lots of 80s and 90s shiggity!!(they have burgertime!!!!)We drank a bit too much(shock!!)and saturday morning i headed to work with the usual hangover!!! Sat. night i just chilled, but sunday definitely made up for it!!! i worked during the day, then at 5pm, the usual suspects(me, jason, athena, aaron) had a little bday bash for my friend maxwell/chris!! We boozed it up for a couple hours, then headed to jackson square to get our carol on!!!! It was sooo sweet(cold, but sweet), there was about a thousand or so folks, and they handed us sheets of paper with the lyrics, and little candles(that wouldnt stay lit, but i guess its just cute that they made the effort!!). Afterwards we went back to the pad to partake in more yuletide celebration of our own!!!(Champagne, and cosmos, yum!!!)My friend rebecca stopped by, and athena had to leave early, at around 10ish maxwell was headed home as well!! Around this same time is when aaron(my not boyfriend) and i had our first fight as a (NOT)couple. Oh yeah baby, and it wasnt some small little spat, we're talking huge, good thing we werent in public cuz folks woulda been starin kinda blowout!!!! Ok, so, how do i get into a fight with this guys whos not my bfriend about him hanging out with another girl!!! Gee, do i love the drama or what??(dont answer that!!)well, gotta get going, for the next 8 days or so, my tales will be californian!!! HAppy Hanukah!!! Shalom!!

Friday, December 17, 2004

i need a new job

So, i dont know how many of you know why i moved back to cali the first time, so ill fill ya in. Money, dinero, scrilla, cha ching. Basically, the main thing you need to survive, and though i had a job in a busy, fine dining restaurant, and often worked 12-13 hour days(i still choke everytime i see my hourly wage-2 dollars an hour, i feel because of my heritage(mexican) i can say this without getting any flack, farmworkers make more an hour than i do!!), i had no money. The main reason i worked where i did for as long as i did can be easily summed up in one phrase, my fear of commitment. I was having a conversation with (has a gfriend)aaron earlier, when this dawned on me. I was telling him how i have this whole loyalty thing with my employers, ive had it forever. I become attached early on to my work(co-workers, the environment, even the job itself), in turn, when i become unhappy, rather than searching for work somewhere else, i torture myself with feelings of guilt, for i feel im almost obligated to stay. At this point, when talking to aaron, is when i realized, how completely detached from normalcy i really am. I have a gigantic fear of commitment when it comes to relationships, ill do and or say just about anything to keep anyone from getting even remotely close to me. So, this is the F'd up part, its like i transfer all that fear of committing to my place of work, and fully devote myself now matter how shitty(in this case, im yet again making no cashflow) the circumstances. After this epiphany comes the hard part, since im now admitting my fault, if no attempt to remedy the situation is made, them im just plain ignorant, oh yay, gawd happy freakin holidays to me. I get to go home to california, then come back and quit my job, suhweet. On a much more uplifting note, the best movie ever comes out on dvd tuesday, go buy it beeotches!!!!!(if you dont know"gawwwdd, you're such a flippin idiot!!!")

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Boys with horns

Just gotta say, i checked out this show last night that was freakin awesome!! It was called"the battle of the trumpets" and had two, sweet ass trumpeteers(what, thats a word!!) layin down the law(oh, my god, i really did just say that!!!!)on the stage for about 3 1/2 hours, they were backed up with a full band that kicked ass as well!! Then, and again, this is sooo why i heart this city, i walked down about 3 bars and saw another sweet show!!!! I mean really people, there's just no excuse why you are not all here with me. Which is why, today, sadly, i must resign from the office of being your friend!!! Im truly sorry to leave all of you behind on this journey, oh, wait sorry, thought i was a bush cabinet member for a sec, the difference being im gonna keep it real, i aint sorry!!! Wow, im super sleep deprived and just realizing what i wrote tells me, i need to just call it a night before i hurt myself or anyone else with these piercing words of mine!! Ok, we can still be friends, but, and again, keepin it real, I really just cant help but let you know i am a way cooler person than you because i live here, and as long as you live there(insert wack ass city you reside in here) thats just the way it is! Adios peeps!!!

Tuesday, December 14, 2004


Next year's xmas card!!!
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Lesbian Burger

So, last night was my first night on my own bartending/closing. It was pretty crazy, i mean, i got my first beliggerant customer, i made some money, and got out of there at a fairly decent time. I went next door and had a drink, then i was off to the french quarter to hang out with my friend jenn after working her last night at the bourbon house(suck ass restaurant i was employed at when i lived here the first time!!). I didnt eat dinner, or lunch, so, yeah you know where this story's goin, i was pretty happy(drunk)after just a couple cocktails(and maybe a couple shots)!! Anyway, i ended up hangin with a guy named jeff, who's a bartender at the bh. We ended up heading to a bar that was a little more punk rock(just his style). There was an attractive woman in her mid 30s who had just asked the bartender for a good place to eat that was close by, me being the food expert(fat kidd!!) that i am, i interjected and informed her of a place called yo mamas, it was only a couple of blocks away, and has by far the best burgers in town. These things are freakin huge and come with a big ass baked potato with all the fixins, it rocks!! I precede to tell her of the tasty morsels that are dished out of yo mamas, and how one, imparticular, the peanut butter burger(burger patty smothered in pb). She didnt believe me at first, but i went on and on about its yummy greatness!!! I finally sold her on it, and she was on her way. About 45 minutes later, she returned, with bag in hand. She walked up to the bar, next to me, and said,"Here's your pb burger." "Oh, no, im sorry, i meant that you should order a pb for yourself" "Yeah, i know, but i bought one for you too!!" I was so surprised by her kindness, that i didnt really know how to react. After thanking her, we started chatting, and (note to reader: at this point im going off of a very vague recollection of last nights happenings thanks to one too many raz stoli 7s, so the true appreciation of this event may be lost in translation since im still trying to figure out how i made it all the way up my deathly spiral staircase(with no railing!!!)much less the pb burger incident, and since i didnt truly recall this story until well into my hangover this afternoon(morning for me) i hope you realize how unreal it was!!) i informed her of a really cool show we were going to tonight. She stayed for a couple minutes more, i thanked her again for the burger and she was on her way. Me- "Wow, that woman was soo cool jeff, she totally bought me a pb burger, you just dont see kindness like that these days" Jeff-" Its not called kindness, its called being hit on!" Yes ladies and gentleman not only was I hit on by an attractive lesbian, but, my nievte(damn you catholic/middle class upbringing, damn you!!) hindered me from even realizing it until it was all over!! I mean, not that its that hard for me to understand, i mean, yeah, im pretty freakin hot, id hit on me, if i was a lesbian. but how am i that drunk/sheltered to not even notice!!!! Ah the dirtay south!!!

Monday, December 13, 2004

What a weekend!!

What up party peeps?? Well its monday, and we made it through the weekend(just barely, no, seriously!) So, lets catch you up! Friday night i went to work at the g. clove, it was pretty calm, since there's not a whole lot of peeps in town at the moment!! When i got off work, i decided to go straight home(i know, i could hardly believe myself!!!). Which, as u are about to read, led me to the realization that i just dont belong at home on the weekends!! So, im driving home, just entered the french quarter, and wham, i get stuck two cars behind an ambulance that was just rolling out on a stretcher, some dude on some sort of drug induced bad trip, he looked around mid20s, and was screaming and flailing for a good 20 minutes before the ambulance finally took off. At this point i felt i, at the very least, deserved a cocktail for having sat through such trauma, but i pushed through it and, after driving 3 times around my neighborhood, i settled on a spot about 3 blocks from my house. It APPEARED to be a legit parking spot, granted there were a couple signs posted, after reading both, i felt comfortable with my decision and walked my sober ass on home!! After id been home for about an hour, i started to get this weird anxiety/intuition rumble in my tummy. I told myself i was just being paranoid and went to bed. At 2am, i woke from a dead sleep, and decided to go check on/move my car! Yeah, im a nervous nelly, what can i say, oh, yeah, i can say, when i got to the corner where i parked my car, it was GONE!!! So there, i was freakin right!!!! Yeah they towed my car!!! This is what i get for trying to be a responsible adult? Staying in on a friday night because i had plans for early sat. morning, not so much a good idea!! Thats it, from now on i no longer discriminate the drinking days, everyday is a day to get smashed!!! Yay!!! Well, you cant say i didnt give the whole responsible adult thing a try, its just really not my style!! CHeers!!!!! So, saturday morning jason took me to get my car out of the ghetto impound(like we expected it to be anything but!). My friend billy and i headed to an art market. It was an outdoor/indoor event with some really cool shit, and some not so cool!!! Afterward we grabbed a bite to eat and i was off to the clove. Sat. night I met up with my friends aaron and athena. Athena had got us on the guest list to a holiday concert from a local woman named theresa andersson. She rocks!! She plays the violin and the guitar. We got to hang out with her backstage before she went on, i was sooo vip!!! Athena did the worm in the vip room, that bitch is sooo crazy, i love her!!!!! We had a really great time and drank way too much!! Which leads me to yesterday!! I worked at 1030am yesterday. Let me just say this much, ive only worked 3 day shifts on sunday, and on all 3, if you happened to stop in to say hi or what have you, there would be only one place to find me, calling the dinosaurs, praying to the porcelain gods, etc. Gawd, i love how i take my job seriously, how i hold it with such high regard, how i maintain such high levels of professionalism, HAHAHAHAH!! The week ahead seems promising, im looking forward to a really cool show tomorrow night, its also my friend maxwells bday, and the 30th anniversary party at igors(owner of g.clove's bar, right next door to the g.clove). At the party they have 1 hour where ALL the DRINKS are FREE, its gonna be awesome!!!!! LATA

Friday, December 10, 2004

Friday

Ok, so id love to go on and on about how productive my week has been, well i guess in a nontraditionally manner it kinda has;
MONDAY- well, sunday night was actually the last night i worked(work tonight, and for the next 5 days).After getting out kinda late(still trying to get the hang of closing the restaurant by myself). I noticed i had like, 4 missed calls from (i kinda got a girlfriend)aaron. Why does he think that after divulging his ongoing relationship, its still acceptable to call me at all hours(from 2am on)? Cuz, its not!! But, you know glutten for punishment me?I called to find he was plastered at some bar down the street from my house and wanted to know if he could crash? I guess on some level i must enjoy/feed off of the drama(though i'll NEVER admit that outside of this blog!!!!). Anyway, monday was pretty uneventful.
TUESDAY- So, after a calm day in the neighboorhood(started reading Friday Night Lights, started up the crochet factory, gawd, what am i, like 70 or something?). I was watching the news, you havent watched local news til you've seen it here!! Anyway, the top story was, are ya ready for this, an 8 year old girl got suspended indefinitely after teachers found what appeared to be jello shots on her person!! Oh, it gets better!! The mother, a bartender in the french quarter, apparently sent the(they're claiming they're non-alcoholic, whoever heard of such a thing?what a waste of jello!!)shots with the girl to sell to her friends, get this, "for extra money to buy christmas presents"!!! Ahhh, life in the dirtay south!!!! Unfreakinbelievable!!!
WEDNESDAY- So, yeah, this day consisted of me, trying my hardest to not watch daytime television(its like heroin!!!), and calling in to my friend athenas radio show and giving my opinions(i called like, 4 different times, and had to use different accents)it was, well, its sad actually that that was truly the"highlight" of my hump day!!
THURSDAY- Yesterday made an otherwise bland week all worth it!! I got my tivo(im now officially a member of c.p.u.-couch potatoes united,)....me pondering why exactly it is im still single.....hmm, got nothin!!!!;o)
And so here we are at friday!! Im not sure what the weekend has in store for me, considering this is technically my monday, thats not to say i wont be able to find time for my one true love, ahh stoli!!! You're always there for me, you never do me dirty, unless i mix you with too much cranberry, it which case, its my own damn fault for taking away from your natural beauty!!! Holla!!!

me and marc, hes sooo dreamy!!
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Monday, December 06, 2004

Sorry blog!

Wow, i cant believe how long its been since ive kicked the funky lyrics on this byotch!!(I'm officially urbanized!!!!) So, geez i gotta lot splaining to do(lame lucy reference!). Where to begin...Ok, well, the weekend after thanksgiving was spent mostly holed up in my homestead for it was the weekend of the "bayou classic". Yeah, pretty much, just as freakin ghetto as it sounds. Its a football game between two(predominately black)southern colleges(grambling, southern). But, and let me just say before i delve too far into this rant, i am in no way shape or form discriminatory with my feelings toward ignorance. In other words, if you're a jackass, i dont care what color your skin is, you're an idiot. And so, with my rant, where was i, oh yes the ghetto classic. Ok, so people started showin up in town on like, wednesday,(game was on saturday )there are sooo many things wrong with this;
1.Its freakin thanksgiving for gawds sake!!!! I mean, come on, cool you're a devoted fan(of schools id never even heard of till this particular weekend!)but, is it really that serious of an event to put friends and family(and bomb ass turkey sandwiches, come on, you know those leftovers are like, almost better than the initial meal)on the backburner for a game? Glad you're not in my family!!
2.Hi,welcome to my city,if you would kindly leave your guns, knives and sweet tea at the state line! Ok, so not to knock tourists, cuz, well for one, im pretty much a tourist, for like, life.Secondly, im fully aware that the economic stability/revenue of this city pretty much relies on tourism. But, come on. Some of these fools should NEVER LEAVE HOME. First off, what the f is sweet tea, and what the hell makes you thing that just because you have it in whatever backwood town you came from makes it even a slight possibility that we've ever even heard of said tea(still have no idea). When bitching about this topic to jason he compared it to us assuming that we could find a tri-tip sandwich anywhere in this city.(Thats right people, all these bbq joints, and no tri-tip, and they call it a bbq, its a travesty, thats what it is!!!) So not only are they drinkin weird shit, but they're bringing the street violence(yeah, you know, havent heard of any shootings in the last...). I mean, first they wouldnt even let me into the french quarter(hellooo, im like, a resident. hehe!!). Then, and at this time id like to point out that both nights i was in at, well, a decent hour(arent ya proud of me dad!!). Nevermind that i was pretty much running on like a 3day hangover, nonetheless, i was home on a weekend!! Anyway, my SOBER sleep was constantly interrupted by what, at first, i thought was a crazy dream of me living in like, south central, or compton, when in fact it was a helicopter hovering like, directly over our house, both nights til about 4 in the morning. Turns out there were 3 seperate stabbings just on bourbon street this weekend, yay tourists!!! I mean, come on, i(if im still occupying the french quarter)will make defininite plans to avoid any activity in the quarter for the good ole ghetto classic next year!! Apparently every year this particular weekend is riddled with beligerantly violent acts, gooooo grambling!?!
So, that was turkey day weekend. Last week totally rocked!!!!
Wednesday, December 1st- My friend athena got 2 pairs of tickets to the hornets, kings game. But it was really just a kings game, i mean, what are the hornets now, like 1-15, its more than pathetic, i just, its sad!! Anyhoo, that was fun, we had really great seats, and athena and i ran into some jackass. Im not gonna ramble(well, at least not about this particular story!)about this one, i'll just leave it at this:when at any sort of event that requires one to, when needing to pass by, cause other individuals to be temporarily disrupted, one should simply use the two words that make said event socially acceptable"excuse me". In other words, asshole in orange shirt, its two words for gods sake, and yeah my shoes are pointy, but you wouldnt have had to step on my foot if you werent such a rude jackass!!!!
Thursday, December 2nd-So, in case you didnt read a post from the day before turkey day, i saw my boyfriend marc at the hob that night. Well, on this night, athena's radio station, was having their annual holiday concert, and marcy poo(yes, we have pet names, mines...well, we're still working on it, you cant rush these things people!!)was performing. Athena, being the kick ass friend she is, aware of my adoration for the soulful louisianan, got me vip tickets to the show. We went together, and watched the concert from the upstairs(pimp steezy!!). We were watching the opening act, when someone said my name, in a very raspy, twangy murmur, i turned around to find it was my marc!! Apparently he had gone into athenas station prior to the show, and athena went on and on about her wicked cute friend(yeah jerkface, shes talking bout me!!!)who loved his music, so, he told her he'd meet me at the show. And so the romance begins. I mean, he's real busy with touring and ya know becoming famous and everything, so we decided to keep it casual, he said he'd call.....Oh, and my friend billy(guy who ive been spending time with, hes supercool, )came to the show with me. We were having a great time, when aaron(guy who i was previously spending time with unitl he divulged the existence of his girlfriend in germany, who was coming here for christmas. Oh, and this conversation happened after i having to rearrange my work schedule, picked his punk ass up from the airport!!UGHHHHHH!)called, he eventually showed up to the show, uninvited, putting me in an awkward position(evening consisted of each slyly putting the other down in some witty manner, and each sneaking flirtatious glances with me)until the end of the night, when in true janice fashion, i left for the restroom, and upon returning found the boys surrounded by like 6 or 7 chicks, ahhh my love life!!!!!
The rest of the weekend we pretty much just chilled, but yesterday, ah yesterday!!
My friend maxwell(kid from s.d. who djs here)had to do a remote(2hr live feed into radio station)from a place called plaquemines parish, they were having an orange festival. Im usually pretty informed on the goings on around town, but i hadnt heard of this particular one, and upon arriving(after a two hour drive that felt more like 5 because, aside from the sporatic trailer, or beautious mansion-there was one that was sooo awesome, only, in true bayou, backwood fashion, the front lawn was adorned with two, monstrously grotesque pink flamingos, why louisiana, why?-there was literally nothing on the entire trip, oh and i cant forget to give a shoutout to my boys at the quickie mart along the way, appropriately named, GRAB YOUR SACK-Im not joking!!!!!)Once we arrived to what to the naked eye appeared to be nothing more than a parking lot carnival, a real bad one too, not that there's actually like, decent ones, but, anyhoo, oh, so upon further investigation(earlier that morning it was pouring rain, and of coursed this little partay was on what used to be dirt, but in its pretty much liquid form could be referred to as, shit, no, oh yeah mud) and having to roll up my cute new gap jeans that were official victims of this supposed festival(me, not so festive at this point)alas a view of the festival. Chalked full of goodies such as; -an orange wine tasting booth(that shit was legit!!!, and quite affordable at only 8 bucks a pop)
-an orange tasting booth(dude, they had like, 12 different kinds of oranges, im no longer ignorant to the citrus world and all of its many gifts it has to share with the world(blood-red navels, dude, they're freakin great!!!!!!!!
-I couldnt leave out the arts/craft booths with many, uh, unique, items(dude, one chick was selling shalacked pieces of wood,what the hell?)Except for one booth, some braud was attempting to sell her half-bayou ass version of crocheted scarves, i was like, listen heeah(thats here in dirtay south lingo byotches!) you just make sure you keep your wimpy ass scarves on this side of the, uh, (at this point realize i dont know where the hell i am, and also notice a large crowd encircling me, out of nowhere, im clocked with something right in the dome, i look to the ground and notice its a red navel, ive been hit!! Suddenly im being pelted with citrus of all shapes and sizes, its like a stoning, no, its a juicing, i attempt to make a run for it, but am held back by my new found love for the plump, sweet juices of the bloody navel, i fall to my knees, and though ive now blacked out, the pain is worth the price, for the lingering taste from that small, round delicacy is with me, always!!) God, that is so like me, i love being a fat kid!!!!

Friday, November 26, 2004

Gobble,Gobble

Ok, so hope everyone(dont really know who EVERYONE includes, since im pretty sure im the only one reading this damn blog, but whatevA) had a great thanksgiving. I, upon eating with my garlic clove family(coworkers)realized something, something so genius that i really dont know how i went through all the previous turkey days without realizing it, i realized that every person(s) who host a thanksgiving feast should, as standard protocol(as standard as taking someones coat upon entering) hand each guest a pair of elastic waist bottoms, thus eliminating both the guilt brought upon by too-tight pants syndrome, and the discomfort!! I know, i amaze myself at times, i really do!!! LATA!!!!

Wednesday, November 24, 2004


me and athena
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me and jason
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Life in the big city

Right now im in the midst of recovering from what could be considered a 3 day hangover. With the occasional interruption of work and alcohol. Oh the big city life, its rough!! Tonight I am going to show with jason to see a guy named marc broussard. Im really excited, ive been listening to his music since the summer, when i saw him open for gavin degraw. It should be pretty cool. So, lets see, whats been up this past week or so? Well, the end of last week was pretty mellow. Friday, I went to a brass band concert, BY MYSELF!! I know, i probably wouldnt believe it myself, ya know, if i hadnt been there to see myself, or you know, whatever, the point is i did it!! It was all brought on by a comment that a bartender i work with threw at me when i said i probably wasnt going to make it to said concert because jason decided he didnt want to go, and i really didnt know who else to call. She told me i should just go by myself, when i told her i felt awkward showing up by myself, that its weird to me when girls do stuff like that by themselves. Her reply"girls shouldnt do things solo, but women do!!" I guess it was an epiphanal(pretty sure i just made up that word!!) moment for me. At that moment i realized how and why i came back to this city. My social trappings in fresno had deprived me of experiences of my own. I couldnt believe how ignorant i felt. And after the liberation of walking in and out of that concert on my own terms, minus any drama brought on outside of my control, or by outside forces I realized this whole independent woman thing is pretty freakin cool!!! Anyway, after my I am woman.... night, i resolved to spend saturday with my dj crew and jason. My friend chris(maxwell) had his brother in town, so we were forced to spend another evening with the tourists on good ol bourbon street. We also got to visit my friend rebecca at the bourbon house(my former employer)where before my very eyes i witnessed a real live swingers convention!! Does the comedy ever stop in this place??!! It was great!! Sunday i spent watching football at rebeccas, then off to work!! After which i spent way too much time at the bar next door, and eventually ended up crashing at a coworkers(zach=the bad boy of the bunch=my intrigue/crush begins!!). Monday just spent the majority of the day recovering and trying to finish reading the confederacy of dunces(a must read!!!), almost there!! Yesterday i had the day off, and spent the evening with some new friends. Todays plans include(whatever i feel like doing, gawd!!!napoleon d. rocks!!) preparation for my date with my boyfriend marc(a girl can dream), oh and probably a meal or two!!! laaater!

Monday, November 15, 2004

Drums please!!!


battle of the bands

So, yesterday my friends and i went to the stadium at the city park, and watched the semifinals of the battle of the bands. It was quite the culturing experience!! This town never ceases to amaze me with its history and tradition, and this event was no exception. With a crowd somewhere in the thousands i watched with amazement at 10 high school bands from the greater new orleans area, 1 from atlanta that was actually in the movie drumline, and a college band from miss. To say it was awesome doesnt begin to describe the event. I can only imagine how much effort is put in to making these elaborate displays of both talent and pride. These folks do not mess around when it comes to marching bands!! I know when i think of marching band i think of the halftime shows at our high school football games, where i never actually watched(i was either too busy flirting with the boys, or waiting in line for some sort of football game snack, what? i like to eat, ok?) Anyhoo, i can guarantee you this was different than anything us fresnans have ever seen. I mean, not only do these kids tear it up with music on whatever instrument they're playing, they get down, literally. I heard tunes from r.kelly, to lil john, even a little destinys child, throughout the playing of these songs these kids are getting their dance on too!! It was crazy!!! Anyhoo, today is amies last day, so im on my own starting tomorrow, wish me luck!!!

Posted by Hello

im with the dj


radio buddies

Ok, so this week was pretty fun filled. On thursday night amie and i hung out with my dj friend athena(the blonde in the pic). She brought her friend maxwell(black dude in pic), who just moved here around the same time i did. He's originally from san diego, but was djing for the past few years in san luis obispo. Anyway we hung out with them at a place called the bulldog. Then amie and i went to our fave spot monahans before meeting up with jason at a place called one eyed jacks. Thursday nights are 80's night there. It was awesome, they had go-go dancers dressed in 80's garb and a big screen tv playing little shop of horrors!!! After a long night of fun, we pretty much spent all day friday recovering, oh and crocheting scarves, amie and i are thinking of starting our own factory!! Saturday i had to go back to work(after a whole week off) when i got home we headed out to bourbon street where we met up with our radio buddies. It was a good time, we went to pat o briens and had hurricanes on their huge patio. A must for any visitor!!! Then we headed to a little club around the corner from our house. Its a little divey college club, they play an awesome mix of music, and its a cool little spot to get your dance on!! Anyway at some point in the evening the dj guys started telling me how comical i was(like thats news to me)they then proceeded to tell me that they needed a 4th voice on their morning radio show, and that i, the janky one, am exactly what they're looking for!! Can ya believe it, me, on the air, with a captive audience, people have to listen to my twisted sense of comedy? Where do i sign up!!! We'll see if anything becomes of it!! I guess stranger things have happened!! Holla!!!


Posted by Hello

Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Sittin on the river

So, i wrote an entire post yesterday describing the goings on since i blogged last week. Amie and I were sitting on the riverbank taking in a lovely fall day. When i tried to post the blog it erased it completely. So, now im trying to remember everything i wrote, im sure i wont be as descript in this attempt. Sorry;o(. So, yeah since last tuesday, ive really just spent alot of time chillin out(drinkin). We went to a maxim/bud light party last thursday night(pretty fn cool!!). Friday we just chilled out, and saturday we were rockin!!!! Sunday i went to a friends to watch football(he has 3 tvs set up in the living room, hardcore!!) And yesterday we ran a few errands and in the evening enjoyed 5$ pitchers of margaritas!! Tonight we are going to watch the lakers play the hornets!! Im also going to see a friend from fresno. Her name is athena, she used to dj at star 101, im sure y'all remember her!! Anyway, shes working in town, and told me to come hang at the station with her, it should be fun!!!! Alright kids talk to ya soon, stay up!!!!

Wednesday, November 03, 2004


4 coop!!
Posted by Hello

Willie, oh willie

Well, halloween went pretty well. I just figured out that the photos i took on my digital video camera, which i thought would transfer over, didnt. But, i did figure out how to transfer my pics from my digital camera. anyhoo, this photo of my coworkers and i is from halloween night it was pretty crazy. We went to frenchmen st., its where all the locals go. It was pretty awesome! Yesterday we got some of that rain thats been over california, except, well, i just say its a different kinda rain!! Amie and i went to the movies yesterday and watched "saw". Pretty scary!!! Then, we went to the house of blues, and saw willie!!!! Ok, the man is 71 years old, and he still brought the house down!! Willie rocks!!! He actually pointed at me during his show, and afterwards we rushed to the front and he signed our tickets!!! It was awwwwesome!!!! Anyhoo, today amie and i are gonna wander around the quarter!! Alrighty well, hope all is well with all yall!! Peace out, ps, this is for you coop!!!

halloween at the garlic clove!!
Posted by Hello

Friday, October 29, 2004

Halloweenie

Well, here we are at friday. Wow, i forgot how time flies in this city. Monday was pretty calm around here. Tuesday was spent running errands, tuesday night we went to the maple leaf bar to see another one of my fave local acts, rebirth. They're a brass band that rocks! Its a very intimate setting, there are no chairs, the band performs on a small stage, and the audience just gets their groove on!!! Wednesday was back to work for me, it was my first night on my own at the g.clove! It went pretty well, there are soooo many characters that roll in and out of that place, its quite entertaining. I mean, cheers has nothin on this place as far as the entertainment factor!! I also got to watch the bosox win!! Good for them, its about time!!! Yesterday we were awoken pretty early by jason informing us that contractors were coming to measure the house!! So, we took this as an opportunity to have a french quarter breakfast, which, like most other meals in the quarter, leads to a well deserved nap!!! Today we are off to the french market(the locals place for steals on souvenirs!!). I will be working all weeekend! Dont know how excited i am, but, hopefully, it will be moneymaking. Oh, amie and i happened by this mardi gras store that was having a big sale on halloween costumes. And wouldnt you know we found our costumes!! Ill hopefully have my photos uploaded soon, so you can see all the action!!! Peace out

Monday, October 25, 2004

Just another weekend in the dirtay south!!

Well we had another eventful time around these parts!! Friday was mostly spent recovering from thursday night, which in effect, led to our staying in!! We wanted to get plenty of sleep for the long day ahead of us!! Saturday was a true nawlins day!! We started off (at 2pm no less) dropping in to a local music store to catch a live performance of one of my favorite local bands. They're called schatzy, and yes they're name is a fitting representation of the band. Their lead singer also plays the accordian(more like jams it, he rocks!!). Anyhoo, there were only like 10 people, and we were all drinkin beer, groovin to the tunes, standin in the middle of a record store. It was awesome!! We then ventured through the quarter and decided it was just tooooo hottttt!(ok, so this is where ill point out that this whole heat thing, yeah im pretty much over it, i mean, its gonna be november, and we're still running the a/c, there's something really wrong wit dat!!!)So we hopped in the car(not literally, id only had 2 beers)to my old stompin grounds(am i allowed to say that since i only lived here before for like 9 months, i mean, what if any are the characterizations of a "stompin ground"?Hmmmm?)Parasols!! A cozy little irish pub famous for its tasty beer and even tastier roast beef poboys!!! (also discovered cheese gravy fries"Im in heaven....")So you know how this goes, 1 beer turned into 2, 2 into 3 and so on until we had spent the better part of our afternoon, and well into the evening in this place. They keep it sooo dark in there all the time that you really have no concept of day or night. Once we finally peeled ourselves off our barstools and bid a fond farewell to our new fave barkeep(joanna=had been working for like 12 hours, and was way passed the early phases of delirium"here's for my beer" "oh, didnt you already pay for that?" "Uh, i dont think so" "Are you sure, cuz, well whatever, just keep your money"YEah, like i said, new fave-free drink given barkeep!!) We made it to another show from a local band mexico 1910(they rock!!), got some country fried steak at 2 am(diet?what diet?)and called it a night!! Sunday was pretty uneventful except for the part where my kamikaze cell phone took a dive into my drink(it totally jumped out of my hand!!!)further proving my theory that me and cell phones, well i just dont think its gonna ever be a smooth ride for the two of us, but, with a little therapy(in the form of dr. phil, of course)i think we can make it through this!!! Anyhoo, if you're someone with whom i owe a return phone call, or you just feel like im neglecting you, blame it on the damn technology,( not my codependence of it), and please call me, because, undoubtedly, ive lost your number(mines still the same!!) Hope all is well!!!

Friday, October 22, 2004

Randomness that is New Orleans

Ok, so just a little taste of that whole cosmic thing that ingulfes you in this city!! So, we went to this bar on a street called frenchman(basically, like a locals bourbon). I had wanted to see a band that was playing there! Anyhoo, we were just hangin out when this white guy with no rhythm(but had had a couple, so it didnt matter) tried to do the moonwalk. You know amie and I couldnt pass up the opportunity to feed his drunk ego, and our sadistic ways by asking him to do it again!! Anyway, i started talking to him and his friends(think there were about 4 of them) and wouldnt you know, these boys were from LEMOORE!! Can you believe it? What are the chances, just goes to show that no matter where you are in this city the randomness will getcha!! Toodles!!

Thursday, October 21, 2004

National Novel Writing Month

Hello there everyone!! Well, and i know this is going to come as a shock to some of you, but, i've actually committed myself to something worthy!! Just fumbling around on this websites home page i stumbled upon National Novel Writing Month(henceforth referred to as NanoWrimo). Nanowrimo is a web based event that pushes novelists on all levels to write and finish a novel(50,000 words) in just 30 days. I don't know that many people know this, but it's always been one of my"Someday's". You know, like our parents always say"Someday, when i win the lotto...(insert fantastically unattainable item here)". So, i read up on it and thought, why not? At least I can say i did it!!(To all the naysayers, you're my motivation for actually completing this daunting task!!) So, forgive my absence/lack of sanity(moreso than normal) in the month of November for I am embarking on a spiritual, intellectual journey!!! In other news, got a job yesterday! In my tainted opinion, it almost seemed too easy!! I mean, I asked for an application on Tuesday, the manager told me they were hiring, I went in yesterday to turn in the app.. When i asked if she wanted me to come back today for an interview, she was like, yeah, i want u to come back to start working!! Now, i know ive got charm, and i guess im doing ok in the looks dept., but come on, i know i aint that good!! Well, maybe i am!!! Amie and i celebrated my newfound employment with the locals fav, hurricane!!! Oh, yeah on the weather portion of the local news last night i learned that yesterday, OCTOBER 19, was the HOTTEST day of the year here!!! Go figure!!! Oh yeah, so if y'all want to check out my progress, i'll be writing it online, the website is http://firststabatthis.blogspot.com/!! Remember, it doesnt start til Nov.1!!

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

Whats up with you people

Ok,so heres the deal people, i know this whole weblog thing is a little advanced for most of you, so let me break it down.... You come to this website (which has apparently been a chore for some of u since there's no www), you read my ish,(if i do say so myself is pretty dang funnay), then (most crucial part), you leave a COMMENT(so i at least know my wittiness is not wasted on myself, that would be lame, i hear myself everyday), lastly, you check back and comment to let me know you still love me(yes, im 2000 miles away and i still have issues!!!) thank you for listening

Monday, October 18, 2004

Humidity, Heaven, Pintsize fun

Sup peeps? So, today was quite the day in this little city. I'll start by saying this morning was nothing short of a preview of the weather in hell! When we left the house this morning(and yes it was in the a.m, we called it an early night), it was sooooo humid(note to fresno residents: U ARE NEVER ALLOWED TO BITCH/MOAN ABOUT THE WEATHER EVER AGAIN!!!!!! ) So yeah us fresnans have no concept of(well, i guess this is debatable, some might have a longer list)weather, i mean, so we were all walking around complaining about how HOT it was last week, but, humidity in october? U have no idea, aside from the fact that its just not right, i take personal offense for a couple reasons: 1. I'm what some might refer to as a mutt(german-irish-mexican-)and my parents(love you guys!!)were obviously not looking out for the sake of the products of their love( with respect to hair). I mean, ive got this curly monstrosity that is bearly tameable in the dry heat streets of fresno, but with years of practice ive learned to manage. Now, you wanna through humid, and rainy at me in mid-october, the hair gods have got it out for me, it just aint right. Ok, whew, im over that, anyway, and in my opinion the most important reason, 2. like, hello, didnt we used to have 4 seasons, whatever happened to i dont know, fall, how bout autumn, when was the last time anyone remember seeing a picturesque autumn? Anyone....anyone...bueller? So, after a couple hours the humidity made way to a torrential downpour that caught both amie and i in our now sopping wet summer attire. Once the rain let up we headed into town to handle some business. Ok, so i always thought this would greet me just inside the gates of heaven, but today christmas came early cuz i went to....a two story Target(it was heavenly!)I mean, as if this isnt already the greatest store ever, that requires me to devote at least a good hour of my day, you gonna go and throw another story at me? Bring it!!! So, 2 1/2 hours later, feeling satisfied, and considerably more in debt, we headed off to a fan favorite of fresnans, Bennigans, thats right people, it lives!!! Ok, so this could be, i dont know if i should say this, but it could be greater than the two story target. So y'all remember bennigans right? Strongly irish themed joint famous for lots of drank, and a few scrumptuous morsels, well as we walked pass the front doors, i couldnt believe what stood before me,and only in the great city of new orleans would i even stop to ponder such an events actual existence, but standing behind the hostess stand(all 4 feet of him)was what i instantly thought to be a real live leprechaun(i mean no green suit, or anything, but he was wearing a green polo!!)Once inside i realized, id been had!! Id been tricked!! It was no leprechaun at all, but a little person who was a host!!!! I feel ive been cheated by what turns out to be purely coincidental height of the host's with relation to that of an irish mythical favorite!! Now you tell me fresnans, tell me how any of you could not want to be in my shoes after a seemingly normal(to locals anyway)yet thouroughly comedic day? happy trails!!

Sunday, October 17, 2004

welcome back, janice

Well, we finally rolled into new orleans about 10ish in the pm on thursday. The sheer joy of no longer being in texas was quickly replaced with my excitement to be back in this town. I don't know how many of you have been here before, but, to put it briefly i'll just say, theres something cosmic in the air here(no its not the humidity, although..i guess it very well could be)There's something so empowering to know that im here with all this history and culture, (oh yeah , and i heard they've got a couple bars here too!!)its so invigorating. I was also soo excited to be back with my main man jason. The man has the most powerful combination of genius and sheer wit, he makes me want to do and be more with myself and life. So, there's a little tidbit about the new/old roomie!!!! We debated whether or not to venture out considering the state of sleep deprivation and fatigue(ok, so we didnt debate, i mean, granted i was so beat i didnt even remember my name, but i did no how to get home from the bar, and in the end thats all ya need right?-joke dad, dont freak!!!). Anyhoo considering this was amies first time...in new orleans,hehe, we embarked on the frighteningly intriguing walk of bourbon street. Luckily for me, amie didnt have the usual entranced kid in a candy store ,typically male reaction to the not so putrid smelling (werent that many stumbling tourists out this night)street, and we were off to one of my favorite spots just off the beaten path of bourbon. monaghan's, famous for their chocolaty, yummy irish car bombs, and true irish tunes blasting from the jukebox, a must on any tour of the quarter. Jason hung out with us for a couple hours before heading home for the night. This is the part where I can say i kinda sorta miss the whole "last call" thing in california. Its also where i make an attempt to excuse the time at which we left the bar. We'll go ahead and leave the time out of this fun little one, to protect those involved. So, we leave the bar and head home feeling reassured of the decision that i made to come back, and feeling satisified that this was a pretty great welcome back night. That feeling didnt last long. This is where it gets good people, so listen up. Jason gave me a set of 3 keys that get me into the house. We had used 2 of the 3 keys when my luck ran out. The 3rd key, supposedly for the front door, did not work. Considering the "couple" of cocktails we had consumed, we pretty much tried all 3 keys about 100 times each, into the morning hours. After several attempts to get a hold of jason(20 unanswered cell phone calls, several new cracks in his bedroom window)i realized, he too was apparently in much need of sleep. We finally gave up and got my first night home sleep on the front step of my new residence, with amie passed out on a patio chair. I was awaken by the piercing rays of the morning sun, and an overwhelming need to pee, at which point i decided i would have to put my several years of girl scouts to good use, i was gonna break in. After surveying the house, i tried to open a set of storm shutters on the backside of the house. By the grace of god i found that the door behind the shutters was unlocked, there was only a barstool that stood in my way of relief and sleep(in a bed). So i got amie up and we went on our stealth mission to break in! Alas, we were in and headed for the bathroom!!! Now for the good part, I couldnt understand how deep of a sleep jason was in to not hear his phone, or the rocks at his window. I was also pretty pissed at the fact that he gave us a freakin key that didnt work. So, we busted into his room to find him passed out, at which point amie began jumping on his bed. I found his cell phone in his pants pocket and showed him the missed calls. This guy had the nerve to say we must've not known what we were doing. Ha, puhlease, like ive never had drinks and had to get into a house. Anyway he comes downstairs smugly shaking his head in disbelief. Well, he tried our key, and, surprise, it didnt work, at which point he pulls out his key to disprove us again, the next thing i know jasons on the ground rolling in laughter, and i see his keys on the ground, well, half of his key, yeah he BROKE his key when opening the door the night before, and had had a few too many apparently because he was completely unaware of the fact he'd broken the key until this very moment. The remainder of the weekend has been spent pretty much recovering from that first night. Along the way ive already received a couple job offers(bartending, for all yall dirty rats who mightve been thinking otherwise)Friday night, got to hang with a couple of old friends, and met my new cabdriver Sam, hes from jerusalem, and he crazy, so i figured who better!!! Saturday the intent was to go to the voodoo music festival, but after a near food coma inducing meal at copelands(let me just say spinach dip served with deep fried bowtie pasta, YUM)and a few hurricanes(the drink)i was reminded why making plans on the weekend is very futile!! We also came across the first truly "dirty old man" ive ever met, 3 europeans on vacation, and ive decided that my feet pretty much hate me right now(damn fashionable footwear). Sunday, today, ive made a list of alll the productive things to do that shouldve been done this weekend, oh, and we had lunch at juans flying burrito,the best not mexican mexican meal in town(these southerners, they just dont know casa corona would put this place to shame)!!! Well friends thats it for now,
Quote of the day:
While walking down Royal street in the french quarter a man in a wheelchair yells out to amie"you make my liver quiver, lets get together and have some handicapped kids"
PS.If anyone has some really cool old school pillowcases will ya let me know, its this new thing im gonna try(if it works you'll hear all about it)

Friday, October 15, 2004

Road Trippin

Well, we made it. Which is nothing short of a miracle. 33 hours of pure unadulterated cabin fever. Driving through texas is most easily comparable to nails on a chalkboard, with a hint of that noise that silverware makes when you rub it together, and a pinch of a faulty smoke detector(ok, maybe this ones a little random, but you see where im headed with this). I cant tell you the sheer joy of knowing i NEVER have to do that again.... Ah damn, i do, crap, that was shortlived--story of my life!!!(nods of agreeance from all readers). Could i have been any happier that just days prior to our departure i joined the rest of the free world in purchasing a cd player? That would be a definite hell yes!! Passenger activities included amies incessant perfection of her first crocheted scarf, my newly found addiction with tetris(you know you love it too).The constant that only amie and myself can truly appreciate was the fact that at any given moment, with any given cd, it was a guarantee that at least one of us was giving concert quality performances that only true american idol fans can appreciate(dont lie, you know you're a fan too!!). Ok, so the first day, we're were scheduled to leave at 9am, since we all know my time clock seems to have been running slower than everyone elses for like ever (so yeah, im habitually late, i really, just cant help it!!!),we didnt end up hitting the road til around 1pm. Pulling up to amies place, the sheer comedy of her first view of the green machine packed to the gills with all my lifes possesions was a classsic kodak moment(pic to follow, once i figure out how to get that shiggity up heeah(sorry nawlins ebonic lingo is already coming back to me!) So, the first day of the drive put us through california and into tucson, arizona. With brief stops for fuel, and relief. And a short unmentionable yet mentioned stop in blythe, california(note to readers:go ahead and skip on the blythe del taco) I totally hyped that place up cuz amie'd never eaten there before and her first and probably last experience saw the delectable chicken soft taco missing its key tasty ingredient(you know, that white creamy substance that we tell ourselves is sour cream, yet noones brave enough to confirm).Our first night in tucson saw me not getting much sleep for several reasons: paranoia over some transient finding himself with a new pair of rollerblades and ikea comforter(extent of lifes possesions). Getting familiar with the sleeeping pattern of my road-dog(still waiting for bruise on arm to lessen from ugly purpleness, result of amies sleepspasm.)Woke up not so brighteyed and bushytailed headed for san antonio. This is where the road trip takes its turn for the worst, the state of texas, dun-dun-dunnn!!! Honestly, it just seems like somebody should have some money to at least throw a few, i dont know, streetlights, billboards, give me something to look at during the tumultuous 14 hours i'm spending driving through your state, is that really too much to ask? So yeah, by the time we made it to san antonio it was 2am. So, not only did we miss last call(depriving us of a well deserved cocktail) we had to settle for an upstairs room further feeding the paranoia that out of all the beamers, and suvs in the parking lot, someone was looking to get my not so shiny and new ford escort!! We awoke and headed for the historical part of the trip(what?dont act so surprised,and no its not the history of bars in san anton, although, not a bad idea.wish id thought of that sooner!)the alamo. Ok, call me cuckoo for cocoa puffs, but, when we woke up in the morning the sun was shining and it was a beautiful day in downtown san antonio. As soon as we started walking around the alamo, the sky was replaced with big, dark, grey clouds. I considered this to be the warning sign of the gods, the warning that i was teetering on a potentially hazardous path, i my friends, was having an educational moment brought about by my own volition. I too asked myself that very same question i know you've just asked yourself, who is this knowledge seeking individual? And what'd you do with janice? Well, let me set your worried minds at ease, the moment passed, and i had a beer.(Along with a mighty tasty burger i might add, from fuddruckers. Big ups to those peeps for coming correct with how a burger joint should be done. I even got to play a little misspacman after satifsying my thirst and hunger!!) We walked around the riverwalk for awhile and decided we had prolonged the inevitable 4 long enough, we had to do more driving through texas!!! And, in only 8 long, grueling hours, we would be out of the state i will henceforth refer to as "the forgotten", and back with my one true love, louisiana.